Alice Miller and the Gifted Child

Het passing on …

Alice Miller argued that all cases of mental illness, addiction, crime and cult were ultimately caused by repressed anger and pain resulting from subconscious childhood traumas that were not emotionally resolved, aided by a helper, whom she came to call an “enlightened witness.” (Source wiki)

If you recognize this please read the text below and describe it in your life story.

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  1. Acknowledging the trauma: It is essential to face the trauma and acknowledge the pain associated with it. Ignoring or trivializing your experiences perpetuates the trauma. The process of becoming aware and accepting what happened is the first step to healing.
    Self-expression and expressing emotions: Miller emphasizes the importance of expressing repressed emotions. This can be done through writing, art or therapy, allowing yourself to feel and express your pain, anger or sadness. The goal is to allow the feelings that have been stuck in your childhood to flow again.
  2. Breaking free from harmful parental expectations: Miller encourages people to distance themselves from the harmful influences of parents or caregivers who were responsible for the emotional neglect. This does not mean literally breaking up with the parents, but rather recognizing that their behavior was not your fault and seeking freedom to follow your own emotions and needs.
  3. Find a safe environment: Alice Miller emphasizes the importance of embracing a supportive and safe environment in which you can be yourself without fear of judgment. This can be a therapeutic setting as well as creating friendships and relationships based on trust and authenticity. A safe space helps you process your trauma without falling back into old, harmful coping mechanisms.
5. Don’t forget to take care of yourself: Self-care is crucial to the healing process. Miller points out that people who have experienced trauma often struggle to take care of themselves because they often neglected their own needs as children. Developing healthy routines, such as setting boundaries, taking care of their physical health, and cultivating positive habits, can help restore emotional balance.

6. Break the cycle of trauma: Miller points out that it’s essential to break the cycle of generational trauma. This means not only processing your own pain, but also actively avoiding passing on the same harmful patterns to your own children or other generations.

7. Use memories: Processing forgotten or suppressed memories is often an important part of healing. Miller advises people to give themselves space to recall memories, even if they are painful, because it helps to gain insight into the past and release emotional blocks.

8. Find authentic sources of support: Finding people or communities that don’t judge you, but instead provide a safe space to express your emotions, is critical. This can range from friends to therapists or even support groups for those who have experienced trauma.

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